Wednesday, July 18, 2012

In which I join the 21st century.

Three and I have been without TV for ... almost a year now? We've made do with actually talking to each other, watching Netflix, surfing the internet, and basically not knowing that TV shows other than reruns of "Friends" exists. This has kept me out of many conversations with work people that I would otherwise be forced to socialize with based solely on the topic of television. Instead, our interactions go like this:

Coworker: Have you been watching [insert show name here]?
Me: Nope. I don't have TV.
Coworker: Oh.
Me: [walks away]

Then I got the bright idea to subscribe to Hulu+. I had toyed with this a few months ago but then just sort of forgot about it. I didn't feel like I was missing out on anything, since most people tell me that I'm not missing out on much anyway. But I wanted to watch Bubblegum Crisis (probably one of my favorite 80s anime shows) and Hulu+ just roped me in after a few episodes of BGC.

Well, I wasn't too sure what to watch after I signed up. I'd heard about Sarah Michelle Gellar's new show, The Ringer, so I added that to my favorites, which gave me some other suggestions from the Hulu+ gods or whatever, and that led me to my new obsession: Revenge.

Seriously, I could talk forever about this show and how much I love the main character for being this calculatingly cold vengeful force of retribution, but I won't. That would be boring, and plus, you should watch it for yourself. Over about a four or five day period, I watched the entire first season and was kind of pissed that I had to wait for fall to continue the story. (That's good writing, folks. And I'm a picky bitch about that kind of thing.) Then I was like, "Wait, we don't have TV! GASP!! What will I do??" I think this is partially because I don't really know how Hulu+ works (How long before the new episodes will be up? Is it like waiting for the DVDs?? etc.), but I was hell-bent on making sure that I didn't pay Comcast for cable. It's bad enough I have to pay them over $60/mo for internet service. So I called up my mom.

Me: Hi, Mommy!
Mom: Hello. What's up?
Me: My TV can get free digital channels, right?
Mom: Probably?
Me: Well, you bought it for me. Don't you remember?
Mom: Your dad bought it, and no, I don't. Where's your manual?
Me: ... Probably at the bottom of some recycling bin, actually. By the way, are you guys still recycling, even though I don't live with you anymore?*

My mom wasn't really helpful on this front, so I decided to go to Best Buy, where at least I could find someone who might be electronics-educated. I tried to sound as intelligent as I could but used the word "thingy" a few times too many. Luckily, the girl seemed to know what she was talking about, and even though Best Buy doesn't sell the brand of TV I own, she was able to show me a few universal digital antennas. At first I was like, "Are you fucking kidding me? $69 for a digital antenna?? I'll stay TV-less and hope that Hulu+ or the ABC website has the new Revenge episodes up lickety-split," but the girl was quick to recognize that she was going to lose a sale and handed me one for $15. Smart lady.

I got home and attached the antenna to my TV (Roberta, for those of you wondering what her name is), turned on the contraption, and waited patiently. After a few seconds, the "NO SIGNAL" message popped up and I was all, "That's what I get for buying the $15 one. And for also not reading the directions with the antenna. And for also throwing the directions in the dumpster outside." But then I thought, hm, maybe I should check the settings? I don't know how I figured this out, because Roberta isn't exactly user-friendly or intuitive, but I found the channel scanner function and voila! 28 channels!! Well, it's more like six that actually work, but that's more than the zero I had before. And it includes the local Spanish one with all of my favorite bad Spanish soap operas. Whee!!

So now I will be able to watch Emily Thorne fuck up rich white people's lives for her (and my) own amusement. And also see what's happened with Charlotte. Sigh, I'm already roped in.

This girl will ruin you.


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